Coffee Crisis

Coffee Crisis is a classic side-scrolling beat ‘em up port based around coffee.

TL;DR at bottom.

Gameplay:

Coffee Crisis is a retro side-scrolling gem in a style that everyone will recognize, mostly due in part to this being a modern port of the original arcade game. You have a choice between a male or female barista who decide to fight back against the aliens who are taking control of people on Earth. The story is a bit confusing and odd, to say the least, but it is pretty typical of a classic arcade game, so I don’t have many gripes with it. The different plot points and dialogue are humorous so I don’t think that the game takes itself too seriously, which is always welcome.

The gameplay is just like any other beat-em-up game, with a rage meter and combo scores. For some reason that is still unknown to me, the screen sometimes warps like you’re on drugs or something, and cowgirls come out and start attack you. It is all very strange, and the music is distorted and disturbing. Maybe I didn’t play enough to understand why it does that, but it is strange nonetheless.

8/10

Graphics:

Coffee Crisis sports great looking retro graphics with lots of color. All of the sprites look great and the visual effects are well executed. Everything is great to look at, and I don’t have many complaints about them. There are some visuals that are very trippy and strange, which I wasn’t really a fan of while playing. However, overall the graphics are simple and effective.

8/10

Music/Audio:

Coffee Crisis features awesome, adrenaline-pumping rock music to go along with the wild nature of beating up aliens, the elderly, and cowgirls. There is a great variety of tracks to keep you entertained while you play the game. Sometimes, there is silence for a short period of time which I couldn’t really explain, but it isn’t too big of an issue.

The game does a great job with the sound effects, including punching and all of the fun stuff you expect to hear from a beat-em-up game like this one. All the audio is crisp and helps deliver the experience and atmosphere the game is striving for.

8/10

Conclusion:

Coffee Crisis is a great side-scrolling beat-em-up game in the nostalgic style of classic arcade games. With familiar and enjoyable gameplay, great visuals, and a fantastic soundtrack, this game is easily enjoyable. The story is simple yet humorous and self-aware, making a fun story to follow while beating up all your enemies. There aren’t many bad things to say about side-scrolling beat-em-ups, and this game is a great example. You should definitely play it, and add this great classic to your collection.

Overall: 8/10 – Recommended

TL;DR

Pros:

+Great retro visuals

+Funny story

+Classic side-scrolling action

Cons:

None!

Check out my gameplay of Coffee Crisis below to get a better idea of the game.